Dating adult jokes

What did the artist say to his girlfriend? I really love you with all my art! What book do women like the most? What is loud and obnoxious? Why is life like a penis? Your girlfriend make it hard! How do you know your girlfriend is getting fat? What does your girlfriend and a condom got in common? What do you call your ex-girlfriend with Pms and Esp? A bitch who thinks she knows everything. What do you call a girlfriend with an opinion?

Wanna see a magic trick? Do you know how to tell if your girlfriend is geting fat? She can wear your wifes clothes What do you call a woman made out of garbage? What kind of girlfriend does a potato wants? Why did God give men penises? Why is a girlfriend like a laxative? They both irritate the shit out of you. Why did God invent the yeast infection? How do you turn your girlfriend into an elephant? What do you call a woman who loves small dicks?

What do you call a musician without a girlfriend? How many men does it take to open a beer? None, it should be opened when your girlfriend brings it to you. What does fucking your girlfriend and cooking an egg in the microwave have in common? Both end with a loud, annoying sound and a gooey mess to clean up. A Catholic girlfriend has real orgasms and fake jewelry.

Why are girlfriends like condoms? The thief was spending less then his girlfriend. What is the difference between a Girlfriend and a washing machine? Why do women have tits? So men will talk to them. What should you give a man who has everything? A girlfriend to show him how to work it. A jealous girlfriend is a faithful girlfriend. Society can never be pleased! Be the girl his ex girlfriend will hate, his mom will love, and that he will never forget. Kissing your girlfriend on the cheek good kissing girlfriend in the mouth awesome Kissing girlfriend in front of her ex boss.

Ever since my girlfriend got pregnant a lot has changed in my life Foursquare asks where I am. The internet has turned into a crazy girlfriend. Boyfri end Girlfri end Fri end everything has an end except fam ily It was so hot today, I almost called my ex-girlfriend to be around something shady.

Your girlfriend is like a meatlocker every guy wants to store his meat in her Every girl is a ninja It shows when someone touches her phone or her boyfriend. The world thinnest book has only one word written in it: The book title is: If your girlfriend complains that you never take her anywhere expensive Take her to the Gas Station.

Girlfriends are like blue jeans. They look good for a while but eventually they fade and have to be replaced.. Dear do you know that exams are like girlfriend? Yes, they are tough to understand, complicated, lots of questions and the result is always doubtful.. Do you want a kiss? Do you remember what i just said? Yes, if you insist.. They kicked my ass out. I was caught selling ice. I want to end up our relationship, I am going to return you everything you gave me..

When Michelle responded enthusiastically to his kissing, he tried sliding his hand up her blouse. Suddenly, she jerked away, got out of the car is a hurry, and ran home. Once again, she pulled away, got out of the car, and hurried home. That night, she wrote in her diary, "There comes a time when even the best of friends must part.

Since no one was around for miles Marie called a hospital and told the doctor "Quick Quick I need your help my boyfriend got bit by a snake on his penis" The doctor told her "Maam your gonna have to suck the venom out yourself" Marie asked "Please doctor there has to be another way to get rid of the venom" The doctor says "Sorry theres nothing we can do" So Marie goes running to her boyfriend When she gets there Jay says with pain "So what did the doctor say?

The first one I called 7 Up, because he had 7 inches and he knew how to keep it up. The second one I called mountain dew, because when it came to mounting he knew what to do. The third I called Jack Daniels. Then the other girl interrupts saying "Hold on a minute.

The dating process is basically just guys pretending that they like to leave their house. Neal Brennan (@nealbrennan) April 27, Yo girl, are you a zero APR loan? Home Marriage Humor Archive for Dating Jokes. Blog Archives Bad Date Joke Hi Sarah, listen I only have a minute. Im about to get picked up for a blind date, can you call me in a half hour just in case its going bad? Yes? Ok great! Well speak..

Total 3 comments.
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